• Dr. Judy

Use the Five Languages to Improve All Your Relationships!


Express thoughtfulness, love, and care for friends, family, colleagues, and your partner with this how-to guide!

Whether or not you buy into the Valentine’s Day hype, it’s a nice time to acknowledge and celebrate the people you care about in all the spheres of your life.

The Five Love Languages (developed by Gary Chapman) isn’t just for romance, it’s for all the people who are important in your life.

It’s simply a shorthand for learning and honoring another person’s preferences, what makes them tick, and what makes them feel special.

To improve relationships, we need to commit to thoughtful observation of others’ wants, needs, and preferences, then modify our own behaviors to show them we care in a way that is meaningful to them.

Everyone is thought to have a primary and secondary love language. Your love language tells you your preferences for how you like to be appreciated and cared for by others. As we generally lead from what we know, this also means that often we show our care for others using our own primary love languages!

The real key is not that we boil people down to five “types,” rather, that it’s the combination of ATTENTIVENESS + BEHAVIORAL CHANGE that helps your relationships flourish.

And when you take the focus off of yourself, others will respond in kind. They’ll take your lead and begin to honor and respect your preferences and find ways to do so, especially if they genuinely care about a better relationship with you, too.

So as we think of ways to apply love languages in your life, here are the Do’s, Don’ts, and Communication tips to add to your relationship toolbox so that you can power up ALL of your relationships and garner real satisfaction and a deeper sense of community.


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